In Shreveport, LA I lost myself in the grief and put as much distance between us, allowing the forward movement and daily grind of survival to push myself deep into the trenches you left behind. The pain was so deep I could not see over it. I traveled a thousand miles and more in a blinded state to the self destructive nature I allowed to take over. I tried to fight pain with more pain. It consumed me, and I still struggle to find the balance I so desperately need. Despair that overflows or hollows me out with emptiness. Too huge to tackle directly or headlong or in any sort of way that holds meaning or healing.
thesakinahsensuality 